#Half past dead movie
Half Past Dead is a bad movie with no plot and not even watchable with your brain off. Think about it, would you rather see Steven Seagal's Half Past Dead or Pee Wee Herman's Half Past Dead, exactly.
Now I were to replace Steven Seagal and put someone more entertaining, like say, Pee Wee Herman you would have better movie and better dramatic acting. Makes no sense, just like how Steven Seagal keeps making movies. Th rap music is completely unnecessary for a action movie, and also if the bad guys jumped from a plane at daytime, why did they barely reached land in night time. They almost make Seagal watchable, which you know takes consorted effort if you're making Seagal almost look good. The only thing worst than Seagal dramatic acting are the other actors. Now for the first time possibly recorded in any movie, Steven Seagal actually gets hit, but his fight scenes are still pretty awful. Whereas Steven Seagal is simply a bad actor, it's not fun watching him and please don't ever have Seagal do drama and saying slang words ever again. There's a reason why Jean Claude Van Damme has a bigger fanbase than Seagal, sure he's a bad actor, but the enjoyable kind of bad actor who gives ridiculous facial expression and can give a good dramatic performance. The acting is bad, this is a Seagal movie we're talking about. I would keep going about the plot, except that I already told you everything important that happened in the first sentence and everything is not important. And instead of having Nicolas Cage being an important asset to the mission, we're stuck with Ja Rule who character was completely pointless and added a new level hilarity in the dramatic scenes. So instead of the very cool Sean Connery killing people and cracking jokes, we get the very slow moving Steven Seagal without the fun. Wait a minute, we are a on island, taken over by bad people holding hostages, and we got the FBI trying to stop them, Michael Bay's The Rock? Are you kidding me, you borrowed from a good action movie and somehow not improve on the idea. The movie biggest problem is that there's no plot, no characterization, nothing interesting ever happens, and nearly everything about the plot is pointless. I went into this with low expectations, we're talking about really low here, around the same expectations I would have if I were to watch a horror movie about killer rabbits and it still failed. Half Past Dead is about Steven Seagal as an undercover agent on a island trying to save a senator on New Alcatraz, and that's the whole movie right there. It does its job and stops, and nobody cares. This is one of Steven Seagal better movies believe it or not, which is not saying much. Half Past Dead has Steven Segal as an undercover agent masquerading as a bad-ass criminal type in Alcatraz when it just so happens that a genuine gang of semi-. Half Past Dead is like an alarm that goes off while nobody is in the room.
Now I had no intention of going into this since there's plenty of other movies on my list that actually deserve my time, but I still saw this.
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